You Might Be A (Star Trek) Con Geek If...
- you run around a science fiction convention wearing a Star Trek uniform.
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: humor fun con star trek You Might Be A (Star Trek) Con Geek If...- you wear those obviously fake pointed ears.
- you wear those retarded Star Trek uniforms (or any uniform from any of the other science fiction shows or movies).
- you see someone lying on the floor and say 'He's dead Jim. You get his tricorder, and I'll get his wallet'.
- you run down the halls of the hotel shooting each other with fake phasers that blink a lot and make annoying noises.
- after watching the season premiere of Star Trek: Voyager you state that you could have written a better script. (Shut the f*ck up, fanboy!!)
- you wear the buttons from the last 10 conventions on your vest.
- you think that 10 previous convention buttons on your vest is a status symbol.
- you wear convention buttons from several different conventions you have attended.
- you walk the halls of the hotel with a fake tricorder (which makes an annoying sound) scanning the plants to see if they are a new form of intelligent life.
- you scan your sibiling, hit your dorky com badge (which also makes an annoying sound), and say, 'Beam me up Scotty, there's no intelligent life down here'.
- you can quote every line and movement from any one of the Star Wars movies in order.
- you use the Vulcan Neck Pinch on the person who got your role-playing character killed.
- you play any of the Star Trek role-playing games.
- you create your own Star Trek role-playing game.
- you say 'fascinating' after every fourth sentence someone is saying to you.
- you do not use contractions all weekend when you are talking.
- you sit and drool on the pictures of your favorite actor/actress that you think is really hot.
- you compare how many shows that have Jeri Ryan in it you have on tape at home.
- you argue with someone about how warp drive might someday be possible.
- you hear that the guest stars are staying in the hotel and go knocking on every door hoping to find the room they're in.
- you get nervous and stutter during the question and answer session with the guest stars.
- you ask a question in such a way as to have the audience ask what the hell you just said, making the guest star you asked the question to try his or her best to answer the question without making you look like the stupid ass of a con geek that you are.
- you dress up as the character of one of the guest stars (i.e., if Brent Spiner is there, you dress yourself up to look like Data).
- you think you're being cool when you roam the halls in a Vorlon costume and talk vaugely and in riddles.
- you and your friends roam around the halls of the hotel dressed like Sailor Moon and the Sailor Scouts, wondering why all of the guys who look like they're going through puberty are drooling.
- you dress up like Obi Wan Knobi (I'm sure that's not spelled right) and roam the halls playing a gong for no apparent reason.
- you dress up like The Crow.
- you stop people who have dressed up in costume and ask to take their picture.
- you get offended when you see someone at the convention as the same character you came as.
- you argue about which is a better show out of the Star Trek series.
- you argue which is better: Star Trek, Star Wars, or Babylon 5.
- you make a Dalek and tell the naieve con geeks that Marina Sirtis is inside and operating the thing.
- you use a squirt gun as the blaster for your Dalek.
- you use the plunger thingy on your Dalek (those of you who watch Dr. Who know what I'm talking about) to poke someone in the ass.
- you see a Domino's deliver person delivering a pizza to one of the rooms and scream out 'LOOK---IT'S A DOMINIC!!! SET PHASERS ON KILL!!!'
- you sit in the autograph line to get an autograph at 9 in the morning and the signing doesn't start until 4 p.m.
- you crowd around the autograph table pushing and shoving your way to get a good picture of the person about to start signing as they come out.
- you ask to have your picture taken with a guest star.
- you ask out all of the single guest stars because you think you're such hot sh*t that they might just say yes (yes, she did just say she has a boyfriend you walking hormone!!).
- you think that the play the folks who run the convention put on is actually funny.
- When one of the guest stars is giving away an autographed picture of the entire cast, and when she asks you to ask a question she's never heard, and you ask her if she knows that her head is shaped like a penis, you might just be a Con Geek (I'm real supr
- you order something at the hotel restaurant speaking only in Klingon (or talking like Yoda or something else equally retarded).
- you ask every salesperson in the dealer's room if they have the schematics for a real light saber.
- you rent a room at the hotel the convention is in.
- you buy some of those cardboard life-sized full body picutes of your favorite character and put them in the hotel room window that overlooks the registration area of the convention.
- you moon the people in the registration line from the above said window.
- you have a party in the room you're staying in for the convention.
- you go around the hotel pointing at people and saying stuff to the effect of 'He would be a good specimen if he weren't so short (tall, fat, skinny, etc).
- you point and laugh at someone for no apparent reason.
- you sit on a bench and wave at people you don't know and say 'Hi' incessantly for no apparent reason.
- you see one of the guest stars at the hotel bar and buy him a drink.
- you get drunk with the guest star at the bar and talk about how cool it would be if the Star Trek transporters were real and then talk about who you would beam out into deep space.
- you see a You Might Be a Con Geek page on a door and put F*ck You in Klingon on it.
- you sit around thinking of things to put on a You Might be a Con Geek page.
- you get pissed off at something someone put on a You Might be a Con Geek page---so pissed (maybe one or more of the things on the list has hit a bit too close to your own f*cked up little reality or you just don't have a sense of humor) in fact that you e
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